Monday, October 08, 2007

Philosophical Wanderings

Defined on shallow: adj. lacking depth of intellect or knowledge; concerned only with what is obvious.

I've been thinking a lot about the different eras of my life. My own personal history as it is. Unfortunately, I often come to the conclusion that I've lived the majority of my years steeped in shallowness. Several of these trains of thought have been triggered by seeing someone from my past on the lovely myspace. It's complex & I'm not so hot at translating all those thought processes to blog-format...and, dear reader, you probably don't want to be bored by my circular musings! Anywhoo...below are a couple engines to my trains...

For instance, a college acquaintance who has gone on to be a force in the marketing world who just bought a time-share on some isle off the West coast...but it's still being BUILT & showcases limo rides and pictures of herself on the red carpet. Holy crap-o! That one made me really think about my career path & what I did-didnot 'do' or 'accomplish'! I even questioned the validity of the importance of being a full-time wife and mother---a thought I NEVER thought would enter my mind! (I've gotten over that now--go mommies! Let's change the world one child at a time!).

Then last night I ran across a girl from high school...didn't particularly like her then, and certainly would avoid her now. Trying to decide if it's pity I should feel towards her or what, but here is a semi-quote from her page "I believe life is about looking good and staying that way...I plan to be plastic in my old age...those who differ are entitled to their opinions". She looked like a Barbie who proudly spends 23 1/2 hours a day in front of a mirror.

The environment of an 'information age' culture seems to bring up lots of thoughts that maybe wouldn't be there otherwise. I mean, really, would I EVER hear about that girl from high school again if I weren't online? Should I pray for her poor soul? What is the purpose of re-establishing contacts that otherwise would have stayed broken? Molly, are you sure we shouldn't long for a life on the open prairie 150 years ago?
Whenever I catch up with someone from "way back" as my Grandma would say, I so want to say "Wait! God has changed me from who I used to be!" and just pray they don't remember some parts of how I was.

Maybe it's all just a part of change, you grow, you move on, relationships change, morph, some die. All of it just meshes together to form your journey...for some they always stay close to where they started. For me, I feel like I've lived kind of a segmented life, because, so far once I've left a place I've never gone back to stay: "Denver Life" "Cheney Life" "P-burg Life #1 (party girl)" "P-burg Life #2 (Jesus girl)" "Knoxville Life" "KC Life"...what's next?????

And will I look back on my current life in another 5-10 years and think "Man, I was so shallow then!"? Hmmmmmm.....

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